tv Late Night With Jimmy Fallon NBC September 1, 2012 12:35am-1:35am EDT
come on, you guys. and, of course, the dunwells. have a great week. jimmy fallon is happening right now. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: let's start it out. ♪ ♪ oh hey oh hey oh ♪ we don't what we're doing. we never do that. thank you. welcome, you guys. it's friday kind of crowd. are you having a good time? welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody! you guys, i'm so excited. we have joe jonas and house minority leader nancy pelosi on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] i know what you're thinking. is there any place those two don't go together? yeah. they're here tonight. and 2 chainz, you guys. 2 chainz tonight. [ cheers and applause ] got a big record. this is big, you guys. yesterday, president obama said that he is sticking with joe biden as his running mate even though biden made a series of major gaffes this week. in response, joe biden was, like, "this is [ bleep ] great!" [ laughter ] another meeting in the oval office?
closed door or open door? closed door? oh man. some more election news. yesterday, mitt romney brought a dry erase board to a speech so that he could explain his plan for medicare. it's pretty simple, actually. all he did was write the word medicare, and then he erased it. [ lauger and applause ] to the point. made his point. okay. this is interesting. it turns out that romney's running mate paul ryan's middle name is davis, which means that his name is pauly d. you can tell from his campaign slogan -- "paul ryan: can't hear you." ♪ hey, hey, whoa. thank you, quest. get this, you guys. a new study found that 1% of the u.s. population is allergic to gluten, while the other 99% is sick of having to hear about it.
[ laughter ] "we get it, gary. we'll get you special hot dog buns." [ applause ] "we heard you. we'll go to the organic place." this is cool, you guys. nasa has discovered a new galaxy that creates two new stars every day. yeah, i'm not sure what the galaxy's name is, but i think we can rule out "american idol." [ laughter ] >> steve: no, you didn't. no you didn't. >> jimmy: who won last year? >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: yeah, there you go. all right. thank you. [ laughter ] there you go. what was it? phil -- phillip phillips. >> steve: i think it is third thirdmonson. >> jimmy: phil phillipson. third thirdmonson? >> steve: phillip p. phillipson, yeah. i think it was gary [ mumbles ] >> jimmy: yeah, oh, i love that guy's work. hey, you guys, i read that the cheesecake factory is planning to open its first location in the middle east. yeah. it will be weird when customers are reading the menu and they are, like, "i thought the koran was long. i'm on page 20. we're still on lettuce wraps. what is going on, bro?
how many lettuce wraps can you make, bro?" [ applause ] "who drinks this much frozen margarita? what is this?" >> steve: what? >> jimmy: and finally i want to wish a happy birthday to bill clinton, who will turn 66 years old this weekend. [ cheers and applause ] yeah, bill and hillary did their best to rearrange their schedules, but it turns out they'll have to spend it together. we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have a fantastic show tonight. she is the most powerful woman in congress. we are honored to have her here. democratic leader nancy pelosi is on the show this evening. [ cheers and applause ] also joining us, a super talented musician and a good friend of our show. joe jonas is here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] ladies love joe jonas.
>> steve: love the joe jonas. >> jimmy: and as i said earlier, we have music from rapper 2 chainz. [ cheers and applause ] 2 chainz got a big record man. hot album. >> steve: number one. >> jimmy: hey guys, today is friday and that's usually when i catch up on some personal stuff. you know, i check my inbox, i return some e-mails and of course send out "thank you notes." [ cheers and applause ] i'm running a bit behind today, so i thought, if you guys wouldn't mind, i'd just like to write out my weekly "thank you notes" right now. is that cool with you guys? [ cheers and applause ] honey boo boo, can i get some "thank you note" writing music? [ laughter ] sorry. no -- sorry, no. it's james. james. ♪ thank you, buddy. >> steve: he can't believe it. wait. honey boo boo. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: tariq is laughing. ♪ [ laughter ]
♪ >> jimmy: thank you, the 10-day weather forecast, or as i call you, the two-day weather forecast and eight days of made up bull-shizz. [ laughter ] give me a break. i got my umbrella. where is the rain, y'all? >> steve: wait. it's snowing? ♪ thank you, mitt romney and paul ryan, for looking like the before and after photos in a just for men ad. [ laughter ] oh, i could look like -- >> steve: oh yeah. you just take this comb. it's as simple as that, and you comb away the gray. 50 shades of it. [ laughter ] very popular book. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, harps, for being like piano guts turned sideways.
[ harp playing ] [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> steve: that's very high. it's very high notes. [ harp playing ] [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: much better. a little tingy. >> steve: i could tell that. i could tell. >> jimmy: you could tell, right? >> steve: the high p above middle -- >> jimmy: the sixty-third string is really a little bit off. >> steve: the high c is above gatorade. we'll move on. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, shark week, for being the perfect thing if you want to learn about the anatomy and habits of a fearsome predator, or if you just want to get super baked and watch shark attacks. [ laughter and applause ] "oh, my god."
>> steve: "no, dude, no." >> jimmy: "dude, this isn't shark week. we're watching 'honey boo boo.'" [ laughter ] "she's just as crazy." >> steve: "oh my god. she's drinking the honey boo boo juice." [ laughter ] [ bleep ]. something is going to go wrong there, people. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, uggs, for having the most honest product name. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: what do you think of my boots? what do you think of my boots? >> jimmy: ugg. [ laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, confetti, for being the most fun and colorful way to liter. [ laughter ] isn't that fun litter? ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, neighbor who pays for wi-fi --
[ cheers and applause ] let's start again. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, neighbor who pays for wi-fi and doesn't set up a wi-fi password, for also paying for my wi-fi. there you go right there. those are my "thank you notes." we'll be right back with "night news now," you guys! thanks for watching. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ vo: to see how this 60" sharp flatscreen rates with our blue shirt, we asked sonny to beta test one in his home. sonny: the exciting thing about sharp is that they offer the largest led's on the market. we're talking 60, 70, 80, 90 inches. that's huge. which means any seat in the house is the best seat in the house. sports, movies, everything is just that much better.
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it's time for "night news now." ♪ >> tonight, vice presidential candidate paul ryan reveals why he likes "alvin and the chipmunks." >> there's something different in their voice. >> morgan freeman says, "no, no, no, yep, ah." >> "no, no, no, yep, ah." >> and brian cranston dispels rumors that he has a prosthetic buttock. >> it's real, yeah. i mean, there is a slickness to it. it's time for "night news now." >> jimmy: hello, and let's see what's happening. the british boy band one direction played a sold out concert this week. while most fans enjoyed the show, some noticed that the singers hit a late phase of puberty during one of their songs. here's a clip. ♪îf only you saw what i can see you'll understand why i want you ♪ ♪ so desperately right now i'm looking at you and i can't believe you don't know ♪ ♪ oh oh you don't know you're beautiful ♪ [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and -- [ applause ]
now it's time for "who wore it best?" the fashion segment where we show you two celebrities wearing the same outfit and you decide who wore it best. here we have anne hathaway wearing a beautiful yellow strapless taffeta dress with a bustle train. now here is that same dress worn by nba legend and hall of famer michael jordan. [ laughter ] we asked our viewing audience, and here is who you thought wore it best. well looks like anne hathaway edges out michael jordan once again. and now for your consumer report, weighing in on the age-old debate between fruit by the foot and fruit roll-ups, here is democratic leader nancy pelosi. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you, jimmy. both snacks are great for after school, at recess or when i'm at home playing mario kart 64 with my friends. but here are the facts. when you unravel a fruit by the foot, we're talking three feet of snackage.
and with a fruit roll-up, you only get mere four and a half inches of fruit leather. [ laughter ] so when it comes to flattened fruit candies, i'd go -- i've got to go with fruit by the foot. back to you, jimmy. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you for your insight, miss pelosi. and now, for the poll of the day. it looks like once again the red bar is much taller than the yellow bar. and now to sports, or as they call them in the u.k., sports. [ laughter ] big news in the nba. a four-team trade sent all-star center dwight howard to the los angeles lakers. here to tell us more about it is our compulsive lying sports correspondent trent goust. trent? >> thank you, jimmy. big news indeed. while dwight howard is the big name in this trade, the lakers also acquired rookie point guard tom hanks in exchange for two boiled carrots and a side salad. hanks is an american actor best know for his signature long
blond hair, falsetto voice and neck tattoos. that's your sports report. my name is stephanie williams and i'm a 17-year-old girl. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you, trent. now let's see what's happening in other countries around the world. it's time for "globe news." ♪ >> hello, i'm michael fitzpatrick. there have been a series of muggings perpetrated by a man who was identified as being 6'2" with long hair and a ponytail. i tried to grow my hair long, too, ever since i saw a singer in a cool band at a rock 'n' roll concert. he was singing -- ♪ oh baby drive me crazy and the guitar was like -- [ makes guitar noises ] he looked so awesome with his long hair and sleeveless shirt. anyway, the suspect is still on the loose. ♪ >> jimmy: that was "globe news." now, let's check in with our weatherman, gary. how you doing, gary? >> not too good, jimmy.
i have a fungus, and it's starting to spread all around -- >> jimmy: all right. thank you so much, gary. folks, i want to take a moment to honor a man who has been part of the "night news now" team for over 35 years. today is his last day, and he's up in the control room right now. thank you for everything you've done, francis. >> what? am i being fired? >> roll the graphic, francis. >> i don't want to roll the graphic. >> jimmy: just roll the graphic. ♪ >> jimmy: we're going to miss you, francis. take care. and now for the lottery, let's take a look at the lottery ball drawing of the night. there you have it. and finally, john boehner teared up at the congressional gold medal ceremony recently. while we don't know how this will affect his reputation in congress, we do know that this is what he would look like if his face were turned upside down.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: this summer, our first guest celebrated her 25th anniversary serving as a u.s. congresswoman. her achievements during that span include being the first female speaker of the house in our country's history. ladies and gentlemen, it's our honor to welcome democratic leader nancy pelosi. ♪
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: nancy, thank you for coming on our show. you look great. >> thank you. you look great. >> jimmy: thank you so much. a lot of make-up. >> same here. >> jimmy: 37 events in eight -- is it eight states? >> almost 10, yeah. >> jimmy: almost 10. >> some of those states a couple of times. >> jimmy: so, this is a rough month. this a busy, busy month for you. >> called campaigning. >> jimmy: is that what it is? yeah. >> win the house for the democrats. >> jimmy: yeah, so this is -- i mean, 25 years. congratulations on 25 years in congress. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's amazing. was there one year that stuck out -- one year that you loved? did you go, "hey, we're doing a lot of stuff. everything is clicking. everything is working together"? >> certainly when president obama was president with a democratic congress, we passed
the affordable health care act, which is a start. no longer will being a woman be a pre-existing medical condition, so we're very happy about that. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's a big deal. i mean, like, 25 years -- you've seen it all. i mean, you were there with -- you were there with reagan, right? >> reagan, yes. my first president. >> jimmy: i feel like now -- i feel like the people think now it's -- i don't know what gets passed, the bill or support for your party. i mean, what is the -- you know what i'm saying? >> well, when i first went there and even really well up until recently, there was much more civility, and you came to get a job done. certainly, you advocated for your point of view, but you always strove to find common ground. and i think we have to return to that place. i know one thing's for sure -- when we reduce the role of money in campaigns and increase the level of civility in congress, we'll elect many more women, more young people, more minorities to the congress of the united states. [ applause ] >> jimmy: do you feel like this
year in particular has been the hardest? because it's also not only the president, but he's also campaigning as well. and i feel like everyone's just going, like, "yeah, we don't like that bill." it's, like, why? it's, like, we just don't like it. >> well, since the president has received and tried to cooperate with the republican majority led by speaker boehner, they really have not cooperated with him. so, that obstruction has really been their philosophy. so, yes, that makes it hard because you go there to get a job done for the american people. there is urgent needs -- the creation of jobs, et cetera. but they just won't cooperate with him. so, that's why this selection is so important. we must re-elect president obama and give him a congress that can work with him. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how is your relationship with john boehner? >> it's fine. we have a cordial relationship. >> jimmy: you do? >> he was leader when i was speaker. now i'm leader while he's speaker. it's a cordial relationship. it's different. >> jimmy: when you passed the health care act, it was kind of funny.
there was a picture of you and him. clearly he did not want this to pass and you did. [ laughter ] there. that's an actual photo. a candid photo. he looks like -- oh, my goodness. but you do get along? >> well, we get along. but when i was speaker and he was -- i cooperated with him with president bush. this obstruction of the president is something quite new. we got a good deal done with when president bush was president because we said, "how can we work together to get results for the american people to solve problems for the american people"? but they have just made a decision to obstruct president obama. and that's just not right for the american people. >> jimmy: it's interesting 'cause if you look at all the polls and all of that stuff, a lot of people are like now, if any time, they want a third party. >> what we have to do -- the most important thing that we can do -- and i have issued a dare in this response -- is to reduce the role of money in campaigns. it's just --
>> jimmy: it's out of control. >> it's out of control. the supreme court would say that any and all money, endless money, unidentified, secret special interest money could control elections. so, i've issued a dare. disclose. "i'm nancy pelosi. i approve this ad." i have to say that. they can put millions of dollars on the table. they do not have to say that. disclose -- amend the constitution to overturn the citizens united decision that says you can use any and all money. reform the system. have citizen funding of elections. low dollar contributions to fund elections. and elect reformers. democrats, republicans or whatever who will get the job done in reforming. as i say, if you reduce that role of money, then you take away a lot of the fight that is there. >> jimmy: or they both get $5,000 to do as many ads as they can with $5,000. and you see who comes out on top. >> who wants more ads? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we want more ads. we don't any more --
now, how about romney's pick, paul ryan? what are your thoughts on him? >> he is a nice person. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> i don't really know him well because i have never been to the gym. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: have you seen him with his shirt off? it's pretty awesome. [ laughter ] the guy is ripped. yeah. the guy is ripped. >> it takes time. >> jimmy: it does. the p90x is very tough. [ laughter ] i got the dvds. i made it to the first part. then i just put on "finding nemo." but you have paul ryan. were you shocked by that choice? 'cause everyone was -- who were you thinking it was going to be? pawlenty? >> no, i didn't know who it would be. it doesn't really matter. what matters is who is mitt romney? and that is really the issue because the vice president news of the couple of days following the selection. but the fact is the election is always about the top of the ticket.
and the surprise about ryan was ryan had been the author of those budget to kill medicare. just end medicare. and that's very unpopular. and so, the embrace of that death of medicare is something that is surprising. but, it plays to the base, the major donors of the republican party, the koch brothers and those who do not believe in medicare or a government role in healthcare in our country. >> jimmy: so, is that going to be the big campaign? is that going to be the big debate? >> it will be. jobs, of course. jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs. medicare, medicare, medicare, medicare. >> jimmy: that's two things. >> and campaign reform. campaign reform. this is a government of the many, not the government of the money. and that is what we have to get back. [ applause ] >> jimmy: 25 years. and also, you're doing a thing called "drive for 25." >> "drive for 25." >> jimmy: now, explain what this
is. this is why you're going around. >> we're going around for a couple reasons. one is to reelect president barack obama. [ cheers and applause ] and the other is to make sure that he has a congress that can work with him. and that "drive for 25" is to win the house for the american people in the form of the democrats. and as we do that, one of the things in my 25 years in congress that i've always been striving to do is to elect many more women to congress. and in our "drive to 25," women will lead the way. >> jimmy: you said a lot for women. congratulations on that. and thanks for doing that. i want to play a game. we play a game on our show. thank you for doing the bit earlier, by the way. fruit by the foot and fruit roll-ups. i appreciate that. >> well, i have many grandchildren, and they will enjoy that as they enjoy you and they enjoy joe jonas and they enjoy 2 chainz. and they enjoy roots. >> jimmy: nancy pelosi loves 2 chainz. we play a game on our show called "one word," okay? what i do, basically, is i tell you the word. and then you have to tell us the
one word that comes to mind when i say this one word. okay? dave, can we bring the lights down? make it a little dramatic? oh, yeah. it feels good. ♪ james, a little music? thank you. are you ready? >> ready. >> jimmy: biden. >> unscripted. >> jimmy: ryan. >> medicare-killer. >> jimmy: that's two words. you're cheating. >> no, it's hyphenated. it's a hyphen. >> jimmy: all right. it's hyphenated. oh, i got you. you're very quick. very quick. >> jimmy: trump. >> fired. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that was quick. romney. >> which one? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's two words as well. very good. obama. >> two-term. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: there you are. there you go. democratic leader nancy pelosi. thank you for your 25 years of service. it's an honor to have you here. we'll be right back with joe jonas. there he is in the bud light platinum suite, everybody! [ cheers and applause ]
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airs thursdays at 9:00 p.m. please welcome back to our show joe jonas! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: they're your old pals. >> i feel like i should be over there with them. >> jimmy: i know. it's your old pal, the roots, yeah. last time you were here you were in there with the roots. >> i was trying to keep up with them. >> jimmy: they're amazing, right? >> see, the funny thing that people don't know is that usually quest can talk to us in our in-ears. and a lot of times he's talking crap over there. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> oh, yeah. i mean, a lot of times, it's about you, too. >> jimmy: wait, what? oh, my god. >> stuff like, "sure jimmy, you walk the dog. oh, i bet you really do know justin timberlake." >> jimmy: you know i know him. come on, quest. >> i put him on the spot.
>> jimmy: you got a giant announcement today. and this is very exciting. >> yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: do you want to say it, or do i say it? >> i'm going to go on a magician tour. >> jimmy: no, no, no. wait, no. the other announcement. >> oh, the other announcement. okay, sorry. me and my brothers are getting back together october 11th for a show. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: it's major! >> yes, i'm so excited. >> jimmy: the jonas brothers getting back together. wait, october 11th. >> getting the band back together. >> jimmy: where are you guys playing? >> radio city. >> jimmy: radio city music hall. >> the iconic radio city. >> jimmy: it's right across the street. >> yeah. it's been three years since we performed together, really. >> jimmy: is that right? >> we're so excited. >> jimmy: and what are kevin and nick up to? what do they do? >> kevin and his wife have a reality show. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> yeah. well, i'm on it as well, like, when i see them. nick -- he's has been making music with me and kevin just in the studio constantly. and i have been shooting the show, "the next." it's been a lot of fun. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. you're killing it on "the next." now, explain "the next" for everybody so they understand. >> well, "the next" is another music competition show.
obviously, when i first heard the idea i was, like, "another one?" but our show is a lot different. we don't really take ourselves too seriously. we like to have a lot of fun. john rich, nelly and gloria estefan and i surprise somebody 72 hours before a big competition. so, if you're my artist, i surprise you and be like, "listen, we have 72 hours to work together. so, while you're hosting, i'm going to be helping you get ready for the competition." >> jimmy: really? so, you just show up and surprise them? >> yeah. and, like, the weirdest situations, too. so we're thrown into the lives. i've babysat 15 crazy kids. gloria estefan's on a tractor. nelly is selling sunglasses at sunglass hut? >> jimmy: why, though? why is selling sunglasses? >> because we have to live in these people's lives because we don't have a lot of time. so, we can't really pull them away from it. like, they have day jobs most of the time. >> jimmy: right. >> so it's good tv. >> jimmy: and gosh, i mean, that's a good crowd of people. i love -- you know, i know john rich really well. >> yeah, he's told me stories. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, yeah, we've had some good times. >> well, that's the funny thing. it sounds like the beginning of a bad joke. you know, you walk into a bar.
you see john rich, joe jonas and nelly. something sounds off. >> jimmy: it's an interesting bar, yeah, right there. like, making it, you know, in the industry or anything or any big break or something like that is a giant moment for anyone's life. how old were you when you got the break? >> first big break was probably, like, i was 15. and then from there, like, being able to perform at the grammys and times square and "rockin' new year's eve." those were the iconic moments you always wanted to do. nelly always tells a story about -- he was working at fedex at the time. >> jimmy: that's right. nelly worked at fedex. >> he worked at fedex. and the first time he heard himself on the radio. he just threw the boxes in the air. and was like, "i'm out. i'm a superstar." [ laughter ] people were, like, wait -- >> jimmy: you guys deliver these boxes. yeah, yeah, yeah. it's getting hot in herre. >> that's me. yeah, i am hot in herre. for my brothers and i, we were
at the jersey beach before it was the jersey shore. so i like to call it the jersey beach. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i like how you made that distinction. yeah, yeah, yeah. >> it was cool once, i swear. and we ran to our car to hear just a blip of us on the radio. but -- you know when the concrete on a summer day running through a parking lot is sort of like on hot coals? running to our car. >> jimmy: it's 110 degrees, yeah, yeah. you guys were just screaming up and down. >> freaking out, yeah. it was an exciting moment for us. >> not because it was exciting. 'cause your feet were burning. yeah, yeah, yeah, all right. >> when was your big break? >> jimmy: i mean gosh, you're really turning the tables. >> i'm not allowed to do that. >> jimmy: "saturday night live." oh, yeah. "saturday night live" was my big break. and it was, like, and when i got that i was, like, that was just the craziest thing ever. it changed everything. but it's exciting and it's fun. but i like when you do these shows and stuff like that. and i know the show is created by queen latifah, right? and produced by queen latifah. she knows, you know, where she came from and how exciting and giant these moments are. and as i joked earlier with
"american idol" and all that stuff, i mean, you never know what's going to stick. >> i mean, even, you had earlier, the one direction guys, they were on "x- factor." they didn't even win. they all lost separately, and then they put them together at the end. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, that's what i'm talking about. well, i have a thing that's gonna break you even further in the jonas stratosphere. in the joe jonas stratosphere. we're have a game that involves rock, paper, scissors and pie. [ cheers ] you want to play? >> sounds perfect. >> jimmy: joe jonas and i are playing "rock, paper, scissors, pie" after the break. stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ whoa-oh, yeah, yeah ♪ well, she goes the extra mile ♪ ♪ she's gonna make you smile, yes, she will ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. i am here with joe jonas, and we are about to play one of our favorite games. it requires a little bit of skill and a lot of luck. it's called "rock, paper, scissors, pie." [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: paper, scissors, pie! >> jimmy: in a minute, joe and i will take our positions behind these carnival cutouts. >> wonderful. >> jimmy: and stick our faces and arms through these holes. we'll go head to head in rock, paper, scissors. whoever loses each round has to click the pie-throwing mechanism -- >> okay. >> jimmy: -- in front of them. it's completely random. you don't know which click is going to result in a pie getting smashed in your face. the first one to get hit with two pies loses. >> it's on.
[ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: you should have been in the olympics. >> i was gonna say. >> jimmy: you could have been in the olympics. >> i'm like a mini michael phelps. >> jimmy: yeah, i'm so ryan lochte right now. [ laughter ] all right. let's take our positions. >> let's do this. >> jimmy: here we go. this is very good. >> i'm kind of nervous. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: my giant head barely fits through this hole. all right. joe, you're going to want to stick your head out a little bit more, man. i'm really going for you. >> yeah, i know. >> jimmy: oh man. that might be too far out. i like that, though. all right, ready? now we've got to rock, paper, scissors, ready? rock, paper, scissors, throw. oh. rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> jimmy: boom. [ cheers ] so mad. ugh. ooh. [ laughter ] i love this game. >> that just means it's mine now. >> jimmy: here we go.
rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> jimmy: oh. rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> rock, paper, scissors, throw. ah. >> jimmy: oh. rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> rock, paper, scissors, throw. >> jimmy: paper covers rock. [ cheers ] ♪ yeah. wham! that right there. oh, good slow-mo. really good slow-mo right there. this is so fantastic. >> it's very cold. >> jimmy: yeah. this is very, very exciting. >> i'm glad they refrigerated it though. >> jimmy: that is one pie down, one pie to go. very good. hey, do you know the name of the album yet? can we even talk about it? no, not yet? >> not yet. >> jimmy: all right. good. all right, let's do rock, paper, scissors. ready? >> okay, yes. >> jimmy: rock, paper, scissors, yo. >> yes. >> jimmy: oh, man. >> boom. yes! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] in your face.>> jimmy: it stuck.
>> oh, wow. that was good. >> jimmy: that doesn't even help when you wipe it up. >> no, not at all. >> jimmy: thank you for tell me that. i appreciate that. all right, ready? >> yeah. >> jimmy: here we go. tie game, whoever wins it. >> oh, i got moisturizer. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's reddi-wip. ready? here we go. rock, paper, scissors, pie. >> what do you have? i can't see anything. >> jimmy: we tied. we tied. >> oh, we tied. >> jimmy: let's try it again. rock, paper, scissors, pow. [ laughter ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] our thanks to joe jonas. 2 chainz performs after the break, stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is going to have the number one album in the country next week with his debut release for def jam, "based on a t.r.u. story." here's here tonight to perform some songs from it with a little help from the roots. please welcome 2 chainz! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> 2 chainz. "based on a t.r.u. story" is in stores now. 2 chainz. ♪ i am smoking on that gas life should be on cinemax movie bought my boo bigger bigger and a bigger ♪ ♪ who he's not i i smoke strong that popeye
louie v's in my archives black diamonds, apartheid ♪ ♪ bread up and my top down on the block with a block out hit ya with that block out i'm dope enough to go ♪ ♪ in yo nostrils i take ya girl and kidnap her beat her to my mattress a skeleton in my closet ♪ ♪ it's probably dead rappers it's probably it's probably don't try me i pull that pull that ♪ ♪ got ya car note in my cup and your rent in my swisha that lovin' so good i miss ya head game's so vicious ♪ ♪ and all i get is cheese like i'm taking pictures i say you, 'less i'm with' ya if i take you out ♪ ♪ of the picture i know real real won't miss ya no lie no lie ♪ ♪ no lie no lie no lie no lie real real say word ye ain't never told no lie ♪ ♪ ye ain't never told no lie real real say word ye ain't never told no lie
ye ain't never told no lie ♪ ♪ real real stay true ye ain't never told no lie you ain't never told no lie that's a thing i don't do ♪ ♪ nah i just do it for the that are trying to see a million 'fore they die name somebody ♪ ♪ that want some ♪ i'll out rap his i'll trap his put his in a plastic bag with his trash ♪ ♪ take 'em out bring 'em in them whole things 2pac without a nose ring ♪ ♪ thug life one wife a mistress and a girlfriend i did what they say i wouldn't ♪ ♪ went where they say i couldn't ysl belt buckle ya'll sure is looking ♪ ♪ ya'll sure is lucky 2 chainz on my rugby i got left hand on that steering wheel ♪ ♪ right hand on that i say you 'less i'm with' ya if i take you out of the picture ♪ ♪ i know real real won't miss ya no lie no lie no lie no lie no lie no lie ♪ ♪ real real say word ye ain't never told no lie ye ain't never told no lie real real say word ♪ ♪ ye ain't never told no lie you ain't never told no lie real real stay true you ain't never told no lie ♪ ♪ ye ain't never told no lie that's a thing i don't do nah i just do it for the
that are trying to see a ♪ ♪ million 'fore they die ♪ wattup >> yeah. ♪ 2 chainz. yeah. up top. "based on a t.r.u" in stores. ♪ i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it ♪ ♪ i'm riding round i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it i'm riding round ♪ ♪ i'm gettin' it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm riding round ♪ ♪ i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it ♪ ♪ it's mine i spend it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it ♪ ♪ it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm smoking on exotic ♪ ♪ my girl ain't got no stomach every time we have sex she always ask me ♪ ♪ for a hundred i asked her if she workin' she asked me do i want it i said ♪ ♪ when i went to school ♪ money was the subject
i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm riding round ♪ ♪ i'm gettin' it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it ♪ ♪ i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it ♪ ♪ i'm riding round i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it ♪ ♪ it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it ♪ ♪ it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it i'm riding round ♪ ♪ i'm gettin' it i'm riding round my side of town boxin' gloves ♪ ♪ i beat the trap i had a coke i had a smile i had a coat for every style crocodile the gator type ♪ ♪ i'm allergic to the hater type i'll take your wife give her back ♪ ♪ nine months after that similac similar to saying mama's baby's daddy maybe when we had sex ♪ ♪ i was in the mercedes and i ain't crazy but if that's my baby ♪ then we gonna have to name the lil' baby mercedes the money that i'm makin i don't see it ♪
♪ like i'm blind ♪ i rather spend money baby i don't spend time my pocket's on full and so is my gas tank ♪ ♪ and all my cars got gas in the ash tray i'm riding round i'm gettin' it ♪ ♪ i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it ♪ ♪ it's mine i spend it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it i'm riding round ♪ ♪ i'm gettin' it i'm riding round i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it ♪ ♪ it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it i'm riding round ♪ ♪ i'm gettin' it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it it's mine i spend it ♪ ♪ i'm riding round i'm gettin' it ♪ >> 2 chainz. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: 2 chainz! "based on a t.r.u. story." 2 chainz. my thanks to nancy pelosi, joe jonas, 2 chainz.